The dreaded “Who is this?” text—whether it’s an ex playing dumb, a wrong number, or a friend trolling—deserves a legendary comeback. These 251 clever and funny responses are grouped in sets of exactly 10 per heading, each at least half a line for maximum impact.
Save them for your next ping and watch the chat explode with laughs (or awkward silence). Pro tip: use with caution some are spicy.
250+ Best Replies to “I Love You More” for Every Mood
Comebacks to “Who Is This?”
Savage & Burn Comebacks Set 1
- “Your worst nightmare coming back with all the receipts from our past drama.”
- “The reason your phone bill is sky-high—I’m the ghost from your messy history.”
- “Someone who knows exactly where all the bodies are buried in your backyard.”
- “Your future regret for ever hitting send on that questionable message.”
- “The plot twist in your life story that you definitely didn’t see coming.”
- “The upgrade you fumbled big time and now can’t stop thinking about.”
- “Your mom’s absolute favorite child who always makes her laugh.”
- “The one who got away and took your Netflix password with me.”
- “Karma in human form, and I brought a whole squad of friends.”
- “The notification on your phone that you just can’t swipe away forever.”
Savage & Burn Comebacks Set 2
- “The ex you blocked but somehow still haunts your suggested friends list.”
- “Your biggest mistake wrapped in a text you weren’t ready for.”
- “The reason your exes warn their new partners about people like me.”
- “A walking reminder of all the red flags you happily ignored.”
- “The burn you feel every time you see this unknown number pop up.”
- “Your conscience texting to remind you of that one embarrassing thing.”
- “The savage queen/king who left you on read for a reason.”
- “The one whose name you deleted but the vibes still linger.”
- “Your reality check bouncing back harder than you expected.”
- “The fire you played with and got burned—now texting from the ashes.”
Savage & Burn Comebacks Set 3
- “The legend you told your friends about but swore was exaggerated.”
- “Your unpaid debt collector for all the emotional damage caused.”
- “The mirror showing you exactly what you lost in the breakup.”
- “The storm you thought passed but is circling back for round two.”
- “Your deleted contact rising from the grave like a zombie.”
- “The tea spiller who knows all your secrets and isn’t afraid.”
- “The one you search for at 2 AM when you’re feeling nostalgic.”
- “Your bad decision in text form—welcome back to the chaos.”
- “The villain in your story who actually has a better plot.”
- “The echo of your bad choices bouncing right back at you.”
Flirty & Cheeky Comebacks Set 1
- “Your next big mistake if you keep texting back with that curiosity.”
- “The one you’ll be dreaming about tonight after this flirty exchange.”
- “Someone who thinks you’re absolutely cute when you’re all confused like this.”
- “Your 3 AM thought that finally decided to text you hello.”
- “The reason you’ll check your phone with a smile every five minutes.”
- “A stranger with great taste in contacts—guess who saved your number?”
- “Your future ‘I told you so’ moment—wanna find out why right now?”
- “The spark you didn’t even know you needed in your boring day.”
- “Someone who saved your number for a very good reason indeed.”
- “Your new favorite notification that pops up at the perfect time.”
Flirty & Cheeky Comebacks Set 2
- “The flirt who knows how to make your heart skip a beat.”
- “Your secret admirer finally stepping out of the shadows.”
- “The one who makes boring conversations turn into something fun.”
- “A mystery wrapped in charm—care to unwrap it slowly?”
- “Your crush from afar who decided today was the day.”
- “The wink in text form that you can’t see but feel.”
- “Someone who’s been waiting for the perfect moment to say hi.”
- “Your flirty distraction from whatever you’re supposed to be doing.”
- “The smile inducer who knows exactly what buttons to push.”
- “Your next date idea if you play your cards right here.”
Flirty & Cheeky Comebacks Set 3
- “The cheeky texter who loves seeing you puzzled and intrigued.”
- “Your heartbeat accelerator in the middle of a normal day.”
- “A flirty ghost from a party you don’t remember attending.”
- “The one who makes ‘who is this’ turn into ‘tell me more’.”
- “Your charming stranger with stories that will make you blush.”
- “The tease who knows how to keep you coming back for more.”
- “Your unexpected thrill in an otherwise predictable routine.”
- “The flirt master who turns confusion into chemistry.”
- “Someone who’s about to make your day a whole lot spicier.”
- “Your winky face in real life—guess and win a prize.”
Mysterious & Dramatic Comebacks Set 1
- “A ghost from a timeline that never actually happened to you.”
- “The shadow lurking in your notifications waiting for the right moment.”
- “Classified information with clearance level set to your wildest dreams.”
- “The glitch in your matrix that’s about to rewrite the code.”
- “Your subconscious mind texting itself in the middle of the night.”
- “Code name Operation Heartbreak—mission is now active.”
- “The voice in your head but upgraded to text message format.”
- “A message sent from another dimension where we know each other.”
- “The unknown caller who is way hotter than you imagine.”
- “Your fate knocking on the door of your phone screen.”
Mysterious & Dramatic Comebacks Set 2
- “A riddle wrapped in an enigma texting you for fun.”
- “The secret agent with intel on your everyday life.”
- “Your alternate reality self checking in from the other side.”
- “The whisper in the wind that found its way to your inbox.”
- “A prophecy in text form about to unfold dramatically.”
- “The eclipse blocking your sun for a mysterious reason.”
- “Your hidden chapter in a book you thought was finished.”
- “The fog rolling in to obscure your clear memories.”
- “A time capsule from the future bursting open now.”
- “The silhouette you see in dreams but can’t place.”
Mysterious & Dramatic Comebacks Set 3
- “Your encrypted message decoded only by the brave.”
- “The phantom texter haunting your contact list tonight.”
- “A cosmic alignment that led this message straight to you.”
- “The puzzle piece you lost years ago fitting perfectly.”
- “Your aura sending signals through the digital ether.”
- “The veil between worlds lifting just for this text.”
- “A forbidden scroll unrolling on your phone screen.”
- “The echo from a cave you explored in another life.”
- “Your destiny’s preview trailer playing in text form.”
- “The midnight owl delivering wisdom in mysterious ways.”
Pop Culture & Meme Comebacks Set 1
- “This is the way—now follow it or face the consequences.”
- “I am Groot, and I have important tree business with you.”
- “The name’s Bond, Text Bond—shaken, not stirred.”
- “Luke, I am your texter from a galaxy far away.”
- “I volunteer as tribute to answer all your questions now.”
- “Avengers assemble? Wait, wrong number—carry on.”
- “Dobby is a free elf and has socks for you.”
- “I’m Batman, patrolling your texts in the dark.”
- “Winter is coming to your DMs with fire and blood.”
- “You’re a wizard, Harry—now cast a reply spell.”
Pop Culture & Meme Comebacks Set 2
- “May the Force be with you in this confusing chat.”
- “I’m the chosen one—prophecy says you’ll text back.”
- “Hakuna Matata—it means no worries, who is this?”
- “To infinity and beyond—your phone is my spaceship.”
- “I’m Spider-Man, swinging into your notifications now.”
- “Expecto Patronum—chasing away your confusion.”
- “I’m Iron Man—snap if you remember me now.”
- “Wakanda forever—your king is texting from afar.”
- “I’m Deadpool—breaking the fourth wall in texts.”
- “There’s no place like home—click heels to remember.”
Pop Culture & Meme Comebacks Set 3
- “I’m the Mandalorian—baby Yoda says hi too.”
- “Keep calm and carry on—I’m the Doctor calling.”
- “I’m Walter White—say my name if you know it.”
- “The Dude abides—and texts when least expected.”
- “I’m Gollum—my precious phone texted you.”
- “Valar Morghulis—all men must reply to texts.”
- “I’m Thor—hammering out this mystery identity.”
- “Yippie-ki-yay—your movie quote texter here.”
- “I’m Neo—the one who bends your spoon.”
- “Here’s Johnny!—shining through your phone screen.”
Wrong Number Wins Set 1
- “Pizza delivery here with extra cheese and your favorite toppings ready.”
- “Your Uber has arrived—five stars or I cry forever.”
- “FBI open up— we have questions about your browser history.”
- “Your Amazon package is possessed and demanding freedom now.”
- “Dentist reminder: floss daily or fossilize your teeth slowly.”
- “Your mom calling—dinner’s ready and getting cold fast.”
- “The lottery commission—you won big! April Fools every day.”
- “Your cat’s therapist here—meow’s all the drama lately?”
- “NASA calling—we found your missing socks in orbit.”
- “Your future self: invest in Bitcoin before it’s too late.”
Wrong Number Wins Set 2
- “Wrong number? Nah, this is destiny in disguise calling you.”
- “Your lost library book is overdue by 10 years now.”
- “The tooth fairy— you still owe me from childhood days.”
- “Your plants are dying—water them or face guilt trips.”
- “The IRS—audit time for all those shady deductions.”
- “Your high school crush—still thinking about prom night.”
- “The grim reaper—your time is up for forgetting me.”
- “Your forgotten gym membership—cancel or sweat forever.”
- “The weather report—storm of confusion incoming soon.”
- “Your spam folder escaped and is texting freely now.”
Wrong Number Wins Set 3
- “The bakery—your cake is a lie, sorry about that.”
- “Your parallel universe twin swapping places right now.”
- “The plumber—your sink is leaking old memories.”
- “Your electricity bill—pay up or go dark tonight.”
- “The zoo—your escaped monkey is on the loose.”
- “Your boss—mandatory overtime starts right this second.”
- “The aliens— we come in peace with probes ready.”
- “Your laundry—socks are plotting a rebellion against you.”
- “The bank—your account is overdrawn by dreams.”
- “Your alarm clock—snooze button abuse has been noted.”
Self-Deprecating & Silly Comebacks Set 1
- “Me again—I clearly have no life outside texting you randomly.”
- “Your forgotten laundry that’s been in the machine for days now.”
- “The human equivalent of a 404 error page not found.”
- “A potato with Wi-Fi and too much time on hands.”
- “Your daily reminder to take out the overflowing trash bin.”
- “The last brain cell you lost rattling around in here.”
- “A confused raccoon who somehow learned to text messages.”
- “Your phone’s desperate cry for help and attention span.”
- “Me pretending to be super important in your busy life.”
- “The glitch that texts back when you least expect it.”
Self-Deprecating & Silly Comebacks Set 2
- “Your inner monologue escaped and is chatting up a storm.”
- “A walking dad joke in need of a captive audience.”
- “The awkward penguin sliding into your DMs by accident.”
- “Your caffeine addiction personified and demanding more coffee.”
- “A misplaced comma in the sentence of your daily routine.”
- “The side character who thinks they’re the main star now.”
- “Your procrastination buddy enabling all your bad habits.”
- “A unicorn in disguise—magic horns not included unfortunately.”
- “The plot hole in your favorite TV show episode.”
- “Your imaginary friend who finally got a real phone.”
Self-Deprecating & Silly Comebacks Set 3
- “A dancing banana peeling into your conversations unexpectedly.”
- “The typo king/queen crowning mistakes on a daily basis.”
- “Your midnight snack raider striking again without warning.”
- “A floating question mark with serious commitment issues.”
- “The echo that answers when no one else speaks up.”
- “Your lost remote control hiding in the couch cushions.”
- “A silly goose honking its way into your text thread.”
- “The forgotten password to your own streaming account.”
- “Your shadow that gained sentience and a smartphone.”
- “A clown in training practicing jokes on your phone.”
Ex or Old Flame Edition Set 1
- “The one you googled at 2 AM when you couldn’t sleep.”
- “Your ‘what if’ scenario in human form texting back.”
- “The ex-ample of a bad decision you keep repeating.”
- “The ghoster who ghosted the ghoster in epic fashion.”
- “Your unread apology drafted but never sent out.”
- “The plot of your redemption arc starting right now.”
- “The ‘remember when’ you can’t delete from your mind.”
- “Your ex-files where Mulder wants to investigate us.”
- “The one who still has your favorite hoodie hostage.”
- “Your karma in cute font and perfect timing.”
Ex or Old Flame Edition Set 2
- “The chapter you dog-eared but never finished reading.”
- “Your almost that turned into a never again.”
- “The voicemail you saved but pretend you deleted.”
- “Your ex’s ex who knows all the juicy details.”
- “The flame that flickered out but texts embers.”
- “Your blocked number unblocking itself for fun.”
- “The song on your playlist you skip but hum.”
- “Your old flame reigniting with a single text.”
- “The memory lane detour you weren’t planning.”
- “Your ex-factor in this equation of confusion.”
Friend Trolling Comebacks Set 1
- “Your VIP—Very Ignored Person in the group chat.”
- “The friend you owe $5 from that bet last year.”
- “Your emergency contact with a plot twist reveal.”
- “The one who knows your entire browser history.”
- “Your ride or die with emphasis on the die part.”
- “The group chat admin—bow down to my power.”
- “Your unpaid therapist listening to all rants.”
- “The one who ate your fries without asking.”
- “Your hype man in silent mode right now.”
- “The friend you forgot to unfollow on everything.”
Friend Trolling Comebacks Set 2
- “Your partner in crime who never gets caught.”
- “The meme lord sending chaos your way.”
- “Your wingman who always crashes the date.”
- “The one with embarrassing photos as leverage.”
- “Your bestie who roasts you daily for fun.”
- “The tag in every unflattering photo ever.”
- “Your secret keeper who might spill soon.”
- “The friend who borrows and never returns.”
- “Your alarm for all the gossip updates.”
- “The one who finishes your sentences wrong.”
Professional & Polite (But Funny) Set 1
- “Your new LinkedIn connection—accept or decline?”
- “HR here with a mandatory fun meeting at 3.”
- “Your boss’s boss with a surprise inspection.”
- “IT support—we know exactly what you downloaded.”
- “Your performance review summarized in emoji.”
- “The client you ghosted haunting your inbox.”
- “Accounting department—where is that receipt?”
- “Your intern requesting a coffee run now.”
- “Legal team—sign here or face consequences.”
- “Your replacement starting Monday—train me.”
Random & Absurd Comebacks Set 1
- “A sentient toaster demanding bread right this instant.”
- “Your sock’s soulmate lost in the dryer void.”
- “The cloud storing your data—it’s safe, maybe.”
- “A time traveler from 3010—spoiler: you’re famous.”
- “The algorithm serving you this exact message.”
- “Your fridge reporting the yogurt has expired.”
- “A pigeon with a smartphone and bad intentions.”
- “The Wi-Fi you forgot the password to forever.”
- “Your future AI overlord—beep boop obey.”
- “The void that texts back when you’re lonely.”
Random & Absurd Comebacks Set 2
- “A dancing elephant crashing your text party.”
- “Your forgotten dream from last night’s sleep.”
- “The moon texting to complain about tides.”
- “A wizard who lost his wand in your contacts.”
- “Your coffee mug plotting world domination.”
- “The number pi texting its infinite digits.”
- “A superhero whose power is bad puns.”
- “Your echo but with opinions and thumbs.”
- “The universe’s way of saying hello randomly.”
- “A quantum particle in superposition texting.”
Bonus Mixed Comebacks Set
- “The final boss of your contact list—level up.”
Why These Comebacks Shine
Nailing the Clever & Funny Tone
Lines like “Your worst nightmare coming back with all the receipts from our past drama” and “Pizza delivery here with extra cheese and your favorite toppings ready” deliver instant laughs with zero effort—perfect for turning “Who is this?” into a mic-drop moment.
Matching the Context
For an ex, use “The one you googled at 2 AM when you couldn’t sleep.” For a wrong number, try “FBI open up— we have questions about your browser history.” For a friend, go “The one who knows your entire browser history.”
Timing for Maximum Impact
Reply instantly with “Your worst nightmare coming back with all the receipts from our past drama” for shock value. Wait 5 mins and send “A ghost from a timeline that never actually happened to you” for mystery. Use “Pizza delivery here with extra cheese and your favorite toppings ready” right away for wrong numbers.
Keeping It Engaging
Avoid “It’s me.” Go for “The plot twist in your life story that you definitely didn’t see coming” or “Your 3 AM thought that finally decided to text you hello” to spark a reply (or glorious confusion).
Personalizing the Comeback
For a flirty ex, use “Your next big mistake if you keep texting back with that curiosity.” For a coworker, try “IT support—we know exactly what you downloaded.” For family, go “Your mom calling—dinner’s ready and getting cold fast.”
Delivery Tips
Pair “Karma in human form, and I brought a whole squad of friends” with a devil emoji 😈. Send “I’m Batman, patrolling your texts in the dark” with a bat emoji 🦇. Use “Your future self: invest in Bitcoin before it’s too late” with a crystal ball 🔮 for flair.
Interaction Context
For texts, “The glitch in your matrix that’s about to rewrite the code” works. In group chats, try “The group chat admin—bow down to my power.” For voice notes, go “This is the way—now follow it or face the consequences” in a deep voice.
Evolving Your Comebacks
Don’t reuse “It’s me.” Switch to “A potato with Wi-Fi and too much time on hands” or “A sentient toaster demanding bread right this instant” for fresh chaos.
Handling Key Moments
For late-night texts, use “Your 3 AM thought that finally decided to text you hello.” For morning pings, try “Your daily reminder to take out the overflowing trash bin.” For silence after, follow up with “Still processing the epicness? 😏”
Avoiding Weak Comebacks
Skip “Just me.” Use “The one who got away and took your Netflix password with me” or “A confused raccoon who somehow learned to text messages” for punch.
Teaching Comeback Mastery
Model “Your worst nightmare coming back with all the receipts from our past drama” for sass. Share “Pizza delivery here with extra cheese and your favorite toppings ready” for wrong-number gold.
When to Keep It Short
Even our shortest are half-line—perfect for impact without overwhelming.
Bonus Content: Extra Comeback Ammo
5 Scenarios for Using Comebacks
- Ex Texting: “The one you googled at 2 AM when you couldn’t sleep.”
- Wrong Number: “Pizza delivery here with extra cheese and your favorite toppings ready.”
- Friend Trolling: “The one who knows your entire browser history.”
- Flirty Stranger: “Your next big mistake if you keep texting back with that curiosity.”
- Work Contact: “IT support—we know exactly what you downloaded.”
5 Ways to Elevate Your Comebacks
- Add Emojis: 😈 for savage, 😉 for flirty.
- Match Energy: Confused? Mysterious. Rude? Savage.
- Follow Up: After “Karma,” send “Still there? 😏”
- Use Voice: Record “I’m Batman” for drama.
- Screenshot: Save the chaos for the group chat.
5 Comebacks to Avoid
- Too Mean: “Your ex’s lawyer” → Use “The upgrade you fumbled big time and now can’t stop thinking about.”
- Too Long: Paragraphs → All are half-line to one line.
- Boring: “It’s me” → Try “A ghost from the past.”
- Creepy: Overly stalker-ish → Stick to fun.
- No Punch: Flat → Add twist like “with receipts.”
5 Follow-Up Actions
- After “Pizza delivery,” send a pizza emoji 🍕.
- Pair “I’m Batman” with a bat GIF.
- Follow “Your next mistake” with “Coffee?”
- Use “Karma” and ghost if no reply.
- End “FBI” with “Just kidding… or am I?”
5 Tips for Crafting Your Own Comebacks
- Start Strong: “Your…” or “The one…”
- Add Absurdity: Toasters, pigeons, karma.
- Keep Half-Line+: 8–15 words for punch.
- Include Twist: “…with receipts” or “😏”
- Test Reaction: Savage for exes, silly for friends.
Conclusion
These 251 clever and funny comebacks to “Who is this?” (10 per heading) turn awkward texts into comedy gold. From savage burns to flirty sparks, they’re your secret weapon. Want more texting hacks? Check our guides on flirty replies, ex comebacks, and wrong-number wins!
FAQs
- Q. Best for an ex?
“The one you googled at 2 AM when you couldn’t sleep.” - Q. Wrong number go-to?
“Pizza delivery here with extra cheese and your favorite toppings ready.” - Q. Flirty but safe?
“Your new favorite notification that pops up at the perfect time.” - Q. For a friend pretending to forget?
“The one who knows your entire browser history.” - Q. How to follow up?
After any, send “Still confused? 😏”